Replace the community relay-setup guides with a first-party step-by-step guide on the website #897

Replace the two third-party guides that currently serve as nostream's onboarding path with one guide we own and keep working.

Why

README.md § Full Guide points only at community write-ups:

• "Set up a Paid Nostr relay with Nostream and ZEBEDEE" — https://docs.zbdpay.com/payments/nostr/nostr-relay. Dead link: 301s to https://docs.zbdpay.com/bitcoin/payments/coverage, a generic "Global Support" page with no nostream or relay content.
• "Set up a Nostr relay in under 5 minutes" — https://andreneves.xyz/p/set-up-a-nostr-relay-server-in-under. Still loads (200), but it is a December 2022 Substack post that clones the repo, runs pnpm install on the host, writes settings.yaml by hand and fronts it with nginx + certbot. Nothing in it matches today's Compose CLI, the GHCR production image, or the deploy/ bootstrap path.

The website (website/site, deployed to nostream.dev) has no operator guide at all: /get-started is the agent-schematic card and /docs is a set of reference pages (quick start, CLI, configuration, deploy, runbook, Tor/I2P, Redis). Its docs index reads "Every page here is rendered from the repository, so it matches the code" — true for the reference pages, but the only narrative, end-to-end setup path it offers is the README. So both surfaces inherit the same legacy guides.

A reader who wants to stand up a relay without an AI agent currently has no first-party, current, step-by-step path.

What to build

One canonical guide on the website, published under /docs (e.g. /docs/setup), written and reviewed in this repo and rendered from a file in the repo so the "rendered from the repository" claim stays true.

Suggested spine, drawn from deploy/README.md, CLI.md and CONFIGURATION.md — adjust where they disagree:

1. What you need — Linux host, Docker Engine + Compose plugin installed from Docker's apt/yum repo (not snap), a domain you control, DNS A/AAAA pointed at the host.
2. Get the code — git clone and cd nostream; note the release-managed files vs. your .env.
3. Bootstrap the deploy root — ./deploy/bootstrap.sh /opt/nostream, what it creates, .env permissions, the generated SECRET.
4. Choose the relay image — ghcr.io/cameri/nostream:<tag> versus a local build, and how pinned tags relate to releases.
5. Configure .env — RELAY_URL / domain, secrets, optional payment processor keys; link to CONFIGURATION.md rather than duplicating every key.
6. First start — docker compose up -d, confirming Postgres and Redis are healthy, migrations ran, and the relay is listening on loopback only.
7. Put it behind TLS — Caddy or nginx in front (pick one as the primary path), WebSocket upgrade headers, then accept wss:// in a client.
8. Verify — NIP-11 document over HTTPS, /healthz and /readyz, publish one event and read it back, nostream info.
9. Keep it running — updating via deploy/recreate-relay.sh, backups, log location; link to the deploy runbook and HAProxy page instead of repeating them.
10. Optional next steps — payments (link to the existing payments section), Tor/I2P page, manual/admin console.

Requirements for the guide:

• Every command must be copy-pasteable and run against the current release. Strip dead or stale commands from the community guides rather than inheriting them.
• State the version it was verified against and how it will be kept current (e.g. reviewed when a release changes deploy/).
• No referral links, no third-party product upsells, no screenshots that go stale.
• Call out what a reader should not do (copy migrations/ to the host, write a full settings.yaml, expose the relay port directly) — the traps the old guides taught.

README change: replace the § Full Guide list with a single link to the website guide, plus a one-line "prefer to do it by hand?" pointer to /docs. Keep the in-repo quick starts in place; they are referenced by website/site docs pages and by CLI.md. The line in § Accepting Payments that says "Complete one of the Quick Start guides in this document" should point at whichever path is canonical.

Website change: /docs index gets the guide as the "Start here" card ahead of the reference pages; /get-started gains a visible "or set it up yourself → /docs/setup" link so the schematic is not the only route on that page.

Out of scope

• Rewriting the third-party guides' authors or crediting them differently (a short "further reading" line may remain).
• Provider-specific guides (AWS is issue Add AWS deployment guide #645; Railway has its own template).
• Changes to the Rust rewrite's docs.

Acceptance criteria

• https://nostream.dev/docs/setup exists, is linked from /docs and from /get-started, and is built from a tracked file in the repo.
• Following the guide on a clean Ubuntu 24.04 VPS reaches a relay answering wss:// with a valid NIP-11 document and a successful event publish/read, with no step that is not in the guide.
• README.md § Full Guide no longer links a dead URL and points to the verified guide; the ZEBEDEE/ZBD link is gone.
• No command in the guide fails against the release named at its top.
• pnpm --dir website/site build (or the site's build command) passes.